Musings

I haven't seen this saying in my news feed lately. Instead, we're seeing some of the worst parts of humanity revealed. Scrolling through social media or watching/reading the news can be overwhelming and discouraging, depending where your hope lies and how you view people. Who do we look to when these huge problems are in our face? The government? Rich entrepreneurs? Activists? The legal system? Protesters? Celebrities? Authors and pastors? While God can work through any avenue, we aren't to place our hope ultimately there. These are not just political issues, not just race issues, not just legal issues, not just rights issues, not just health issues. These are heart issues. There are so many things I could say about this, but I only have fifteen minutes of quiet before a child will emerge from her quiet time. So this is the main point I want to make: What would the world look like if you were humble? If we were all humble? The way people view those who look differently, thi...

We recently watched The Polar Express as a family. I remember loving the slideshow of it as a kid--the elementary school librarian would show it each year before Christmas. Our oldest daughter is four and we've had many conversations this year about Santa. As over-analyzers, Matt and I can't just go with the flow and try to convince her that Santa is real. Many talk about the "magic" of Santa, and how they don't want to ruin that for their kids. I'm not here to argue about what you should tell your kids about Santa, but I do want to share my thoughts on this "magic" business. Our daughter, like most four-year-olds, is really into pretending. She also loves watching shows and reading books. Often, she gets that hopeful sparkle in her wide eyes and asks things like, "Are superheroes real?!" or "Are unicorns real?" On a basic developmental level, she's forming an important life skill of being able to differentiate between wh...

A few years ago I found a "copycat recipe" online for Olive Garden's Chicken & Gnocchi soup (anyone else love that bottomless soup, salad, and breadstick lunch special??) and have modified it a bit each time I've made it. It's my go-to meal to take to friends with new babies because everyone raves about it and big brothers and sisters love it too!  The measurements can be adjusted a bit for your preferences, but here is how I've been making it: Ingredients: 2 cups chicken breasts, cooked and diced (I roast them with salt, garlic powder, onion powder, and Italian seasoning blend) 6 cups chicken broth (I make it with Better Than Bouillon) 2 cups cream 1 cup celery, finely diced 1 1/2 cup carrots, finely sliced 1 cup onion, finely diced 3 garlic cloves, minced 1 cup fresh spinach, chopped  1 tablespoon avocado oil 1 teaspoon dried thyme 1 teaspoon parsley 1/4 teaspoon salt 1 pound potato gnocchi* Parmesan cheese, as desired Heat up a sto...

Sometimes I don't feel much. Life feels like a continuously expanding to-do list, and I get in "task mode" and wonder why I want to pull away from everything. In the moment I struggle to put my finger on it, but I know I need a break. And then something awakens my senses and it's the epitome of refreshment. Last night, it was listening to Spiegel im Spiegel by Arvo Part , the song I walked down the aisle to, which Matt and I often listened to in our little studio apartment in Chicago. It also reminded me of the times I picnicked at the Pritzker Pavilion while listening to the Chicago Symphony Orchestra on amazing summer days in the city. There's something about old memories that help me be less detached from myself. As I talked to Matt about this, he said something along the lines of, "that's why art is so human." Because it reminds us that we're not just here to do tasks and stay alive. Art seems like an extra, because it's not ...

Whenever I hear people talk about trying to view parenting as ministry (or even your most important ministry!), I think of things like family/bedtime devotions, and serving--because our babies and toddlers need our help with most things. So, we read the children's Bibles and theology flash cards and pray together and I clean the children and all the things and make the food and carry them and get up in the middle of the night, etc. And I definitely have room to improve with the discipling and serving. But what good is all that if my interactions with my children throughout the day are not loving? Parenting a toddler has made it exceedingly clear to me how much I struggle with patience and gentleness. I feel like Paul in Romans 7, because I hate the thought of talking down to my kids or yelling or expressing my frustration or annoyance... but I struggle to stop doing what I hate!  This past weekend I was at a marriage seminar with teaching from Dave Harvey, and the idea that ...

I've always loved deviled eggs, but can never bring myself to hard boil and peel eggs. Ugh. But, Costco saves the day again! They have organic hard boiled, peeled eggs at a wonderful price. So suddenly the thought of making deviled eggs feels possible! Here's how I did it. I know if you're making this as an appetizer, you'll do a much bigger batch, but these were just for Matt and I :) Ingredients: 3 hard boiled, peeled eggs 1/8 cup Miracle Whip Light 1/2 tsp yellow mustard Several drops buffalo/hot sauce Pinch of salt Paprika Cut the eggs in half length-wise. Squeeze each half to pop the yolks into a bowl (SO EASY). Also put in the bowl the rest of the ingredients, except paprika. Use a fork to mix it all up. Then spoon the mixture back into the eggs. If you want them to look fancy, feel free to pull out your frosting supplies and pipe the filling into the egg whites. But I decided sprinkled paprika is fancy enough for me!

Sometimes even those of us who pride ourselves in making things from scratch finally get honest with ourselves and admit we need to compromise. Since I was making all of our food for Christmas, one compromise was buying pie crust instead of making it from scratch. And since I bought it at Costco, I had a bunch in the freezer. So here I am, finally using some more of that pie crust. And it is delicious and I have no shame!  I decided to start with a Betty Crocker recipe and make some modifications to my liking instead of wasting time searching online amongst everyone claiming their recipe is the best. Here's what I ended up with: 1 1/2 cups (roughly) peas, sliced carrots, and sliced mushrooms (or you can switch these with celery, broccoli, or cauliflower if that's what you like) 1/2 cup chopped onion (I used leeks) 2 cups cut-up cooked chicken (another suggestion for convenience: use a rotisserie chicken!) 2 tablespoons butter 1/2 cup all purpose flour 1 1/2 cups chicken...

I went to a show on Friday. I'm embarrassed to say that it was the first show I've been to in a few years. It was a benefit concert with opening bands I had never heard of. Really I was there to see my favorite ska band ever. But I need to find some new music... I feel like such an old person when all I listen to are CD's I bought 7-10 years ago. So I listened to the opening bands too. The first band took the stage. Cue fog machine and fancy lights, and background track with a creepy voice recording for the creepy-looking guitarist to mouth along to... I'm not impressed. Really the music wasn't terrible. It was a flashback relief to FEEL bass instead of straining to hear it beneath the vocals (which is what happens at most churches--the primary place I hear live music these days). I was reminded of my "bass chick" days, as the lead singer thrashed/danced around with intensity I could never fake. As he stood on the monitors in his skinny jeans and prompte...

I think relevance isn't about being "cool." It's probably not even so much about culture. I think it's about pointing out God's work. I was thinking about how I love hand-made stuff, how I love beautiful things like waterfalls and paintings and music and trees and fire and clouds and people--people who live for important things and hold their ground respectfully, people who are humble and want to teach others, people who are quick to encourage and full of joy--and how confessing these things as being from God makes Him relevant. A lot of people seem to experience His relevance in the opposite way--He allows/causes disasters and trauma, He fuels the radical conservative politicians and TV preachers, or He is absent and harsh (based on loneliness and guilt). One of the things that has stood out to me from Donald Miller (I'm reading Blue Like Jazz now) is how people do things because of what affects their hearts: I don't believe I will ever walk awa...

This book I've been reading has been rocking my socks off. I bought it several years ago--it is one of many books which I've packed and unpacked each time I've moved and thought, "I wish I had time to read that right now." I've been reading a chapter a day for the last week or so. And every day I get that "Man, I wish everyone could read this book!" feeling. It's a Christian book, a creative telling of the Gospel, that I would feel totally comfortable recommending to my non-Christian peers. Searching for God Knows What  (there are super cheap used copies on Amazon, if I'm convincing you it might be worth reading). For those of us Christians who talk a lot about ideas and trends and like to analyze often, there has been lots of talk about postmodernity, narrative, our need for relationship, what the Gospel is, etc. Some people enjoy reading thick books by theologians to understand such things. Others want things that are easier to read in or...

In many ways, being in Grad. School/Seminary is incredibly overwhelming. Do you ever try to read something--maybe an article online--with somebody else, and the other person is reading much faster than you, so they turn the page/scroll before you're ready, and you feel like you're missing half of the article? That's something of what grad. school feels like... like I want somebody to slow things down so I can actually process them and fit it all together and analyze things. Unless I want to take one class per semester and be a student for life (which I wouldn't mind all that much, if it didn't feel so impractical), I'm realizing that will never happen. Anyway, in spite of not being able to actually take in all of the complexity of what I'm supposed to be learning, there have been some big themes which I've noticed.... those paradigm shifters, those lightbulb "a-ha!" moments. In example, marital counseling is complex, because people are compl...

The last year and a half that Matt and I lived in Chicago, we had the privilege of being interns in our church's ministry training program, Chicago Plan. One year we talked a lot about what it means to be "missional." At the end of the year, each intern wrote and presented a paper in response to all of our discussions. When I wrote my paper, I was again working through the reality of God as a Being. So, while it is written in the context of Chicago, Holy Trinity Church, and my job at Jimmy John's, may it help you to consider whether you've had similar experiences in your own context.                 The Bible is not God. The Gospel is not God. But there is a Creator who is Ruler over all, who defines reality and truth. He is just. He is Love. There is a Savior who frees the enslaved and brings hope to those in despair and loves so deeply that I often can’t understand it enough to be emotionally affected by i...

Relationship with someone I have never seen with my own eyes, and whose voice I've never audibly heard, but whose presence is everywhere (including within me) can be challenging. Specifically, I have had various times throughout my relationship with Jesus when I've realized He seems more like an idea than a Person. Those realizations usually make sense of my spiritual apathy. As I again try to realign with the reality of Jesus' person, I'm looking back on previous times I have worked through this and sharing some things I wrote during those times. Like most Moody students, one of the best classes I ever took was Images of Christ in the Novel, taught by Dr. Rosalie De Rosset. Below is an edited version of the first paper I wrote for that class, 4 years ago: My image of Christ is blurry. In the last year I’ve become a little flustered with how abstract God is to me. It’s shocking to be raised in an evangelical church that emphasizes relationship with Christ, only...

    I have always squirmed when people talk about being "nothing" without Christ, being able to do "nothing" on our own, etc. In our self-esteeming culture, it doesn't easily integrate with our personal philosophies. I've never been the type to beat myself up; I don't really struggle much with feelings of failure. But through reading (again) The Search For Significance (by Robert McGee), I've realized that's because I don't often try the things I would probably fail at. So my confidence is based on my own performance just as much as a discouraged person's lack of confidence is based on their performance.      So how have I been dealing with this? By thinking more about my identity in Christ. It's a concept I had heard references to for years, but didn't really start to grasp it until a Moody professor taught me and my classmates to notice all of the references to Christ in the first few chapters of Ephesians. In looking at thos...